Birds are chirping. Im a vegetarian so I cook my own thing. 1. These are the moms and dads who made us laugh out loud. ", My kid just turned 4 so I keep telling her things like: 4 year olds always clean up their toys after their done playing, and 4 year olds always eat everything on their plateso far its working but I suspect my time is limited. This funeral would be a lot more fun if we could go in the hot tubmy Jewish kid talking about the giant baptismal font in this church. Top 20 Best Tweets From Funny Mom and Teacher Katie D. Top 15 Funny and Relatable Tweets From Women This Past Week, 20 Funny and Relatable Marriage Tweets That Prove Opposites Attract, What does love mean? Hilarious and Heartwarming Answers From Kids. Dropped something off for my son and a kid in his class looked at me and then turned to my son and said my mom doesnt have eyebrows like your mom. So each week, we round up the most hilarious quips from parents on Twitter to spread the joy. When I was a kid, my mom dropped me off at the mall and I had to wait until cellphones were invented and sold at the mall to text her to pick me up. Here are some of my favorite quips from this week. Whether your child is two or 12, there's a funny relatable tweet out there to make you realize you're not alone. 25 of the Funniest Tweets About Life With Preschoolers, 20 Hilarious Tweets That Capture the Reality of Working in Retail or Customer Service, Top 20 Funniest Tweets From Parents This Week. Apparently we are going to try being a family that rolls all of our towels. The Charmin' Carmen (@Charmin_Carmen) January 11, 2023. Politics Joe Biden Congress Extremism Elections 2022 Thats what keeps the joints gliding. I dont know much about parenting, but I know theres a goldfish cracker under your couch right now. My kids knew that. pic.twitter.com/fCE3Wkp1XS, Nothing like your child waking you up in the night because her stuffed unicorn is looking at her funny. So each week, we round up the most hilarious quips from parents on . My husband put the dishes away.If you have any information about their whereabouts we are deeply concerned for their safety at this time. Scroll down to read the latest batch, and follow @HuffPostParents on Twitter for more! pic.twitter.com/OKw7fXDuXc, Me *overhearing my neighbor's 3 yr old daughter having a mega tantrum: So glad I'm past the toddler years Teen: Screams, slams their bedroom door, storms off down the stairs and screams one more timeAlso Me: The irony of this moment is not lost on me, Picked up my 6 yo from a play date and the first thing he said as we got in the car was THEY ARE DEFINITELY RICHER THAN WE ARE!!. These funny tweets definitely help alleviate growing pains. Allison Slater Tate is a freelance writer and editor in Florida specializing in parenting and college admissions. IE 11 is not supported. Getting someone pregnant makes you a father. I dont know why they call it a geriatric pregnancy. Also, uh oh, summer. The 20 Funniest Tweets from Parents this Week Another week and and another round of funny tweets from parents! 8: We only go. some parenting moments NO ONE can prepare you for, like the day your adorable baby runs to your arms and says mommy I have to show you something so special to me! and she leads you to the bathroom and unveils her incredibly special and disturbingly gigantic mound of poop. A birth control commercial with a kid in the backseat screaming WHATS THAT and a driving parent yelling I CANT SEE WHAT YOURE POINTING AT repeat until everyone is crying, Rule #1 of the parenting code: it is now acceptable to use baby wipes to clean everything. "80% of parenting is trying not to laugh when youre supposed to be mad". I think the reason it's cloudy is because the sun wanted to sleep longer.-my 4yo, the meteorologist. Part of HuffPost Relationships. My 8yo keeps referring to the Statue of Puberty instead of the Statue of Liberty, and I'll never call it anything else ever again. 8-year-old: Do you have a favorite kid?Me: That would be like you having a favorite parent.8: It's Mom. Well, yeah. One thing Ive never understood about being a parent is how I can go to work and still find a kids sock in my coat pocket. This what I see when I walked in. Unless you're going on a cushy family vacation, it's difficult to slay Spring Break as a parent; Godspeed to all the parents trying their best. ". Main Menu. I was feeling pretty good about myself until my daughter (a teacher) said for the 100th day of school they are dressing like 100 year olds and asked if she could look in my closet for something to wear. "My kids sure do make a lot of plans for being people who don't know how to drive themselves anywhere. ", Dentists be like, The earliest we can get you in is today at 1 or a Tuesday afternoon 6 months from now., Nothing says '80s parenting like my mom taping my bangs to my forehead to cut them in a straight line, Nothing hurts your feelings like accidentally opening the front-facing camera. She is a proud Gen Xer, ENFP, Leo, Diet Coke enthusiast, and champion of the Oxford Comma. Top 20 Best Tweets From Funny Mom and Teacher Katie D. Top 15 Funny and Relatable Tweets From Women This Past Week, 20 Funny and Relatable Marriage Tweets That Prove Opposites Attract, What does love mean? Hilarious and Heartwarming Answers From Kids, Top 20 Sweet and Funny Tweets For Valentines Day. Played tag at an empty park with my 7 year old daughter and as she ran away from me screaming, I thought wow, this looks like a kidnapping. 25 Funny and Relatable Tweets About Raising Boys, 20 Hilarious Tweets That Capture the Reality of Working in Retail or Customer Service. Do you love humor and heartwarming stories? Here are some of the best, funniest, and most viral tweets from this week. My husband and son are farting on one another. Me, a Jewish mother, to her children in September. It's finally March, and you know what that means? I hate when new parents ask who the baby looks like. We're watching Shrek as a family and at the moment when Fiona turned from a woman into an ogre, my 2yo pointed to the TV and said "now she's a mom.". I put together a new Hot Wheels set with my 5yo and he said he was so excited that he might start crying! Me: You can't wear that to school.10-year-old: Why not?Me: It's not nice enough.10: I've been going to school with these kids for years. ". Yay, summer! , Excellent news! 7YO: Can I get a snack?Me: Are you feeling hungry?7YO: You dont need to be hungry to eat a cookie! 2023 BuzzFeed, Inc. All rights reserved. My kid could break a window and they would be like, "Way to go, buddy! By entering your email and clicking Sign Up, you're agreeing to let us send you customized marketing messages about us and our advertising partners. Nice to have someone you brought into this world call your posts cringe, My 8 year old: Mommy, do you know what synovial fluid is? Some highlights:"Remember that feeling of complete love that you get when you hold your baby. 2023 BuzzFeed, Inc. All rights reserved. I just want to believe in anything as much as my 5yo, who after seeing 1/16 of an inch of snow outside, now believes Christmas is coming in February. i forgot to set the trash can out and missed the pick up. Its not like we pee our pants, wake up 40 times a night, wear our pajamas around all day and oh. Jun 24, 2022, 09:46 AM EDT Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. Scroll down to read the latest batch, and follow @HuffPostParents on Twitter for more! My 6-year-old: What's the difference between a barracuda & a shark?Me: When a barracuda is near, you'll hear a guitar riff. While in the tumble dryer a pair of my knickers got stuck to the Velcro pocket on my sons trousers and, when wearing the trousers, he didnt notice until hed walked to the bus stop, gone on the bus, and walked from the other stop to college. My tween, who wanted money, told me I dont look a day over 41. You are also agreeing to our Terms of Service and Privacy Policy. Top 20 Funniest Tweets From Parents This Week Another week and and another round of funny tweets from parents! Just one. You are also agreeing to our Terms of Service and Privacy Policy. Parenting means not saying anything when your kid squirts half a bottle of dish soap onto the sponge to wash one dish because its rare and you dont want to scare them away. Isnt that amazing?Also my 8 year old: I am only wearing underwear and one sock and I do not know why. If we didnt have synovial fluid it would hurt to move! Wishing you all a happy and healthy weekend! Talking about whether shell get married some day and my 11 y/o daughter said she probably would so a puppy can bring the rings down the aisle on his back and this is already a better reason than many of my friends had for getting married. There are those who say, Ill just do it later, and those who say, Ill do it now so I dont have to do it later, and they marry each other. Oldest child: Here are 100 pictures of me as a baby eating oatmeal. me: I had my first crush on a girl when I was in the first grade. My 9YO is half way done sharing her dream which she started narrating last Monday. By entering your email and clicking Sign Up, you're agreeing to let us send you customized marketing messages about us and our advertising partners. Im on a business trip and I get this text from my husband, I think the kids have hidden a hotdog in the house, but I cant find it. 5 min read Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the. There should be a different word for vacation when its with your kids. Part of HuffPost Parenting. Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. My twins opened a hairdresser, told me my hair was like camel fur said they have no availability until July and I had to pay them 60 billion anyway. My 5yo holding her baby, "I can't leave the baby home alone!" V punk obviously but otherwise, truly fucked me up. careful with that cursor son. Every week, we round up the most hilarious quips from parents on Twitter to spread the joy. Turn it off! Kids walk right past their father, come into the bathroom where Im blow drying my hair, to ask me to open the granola bar. Janene #1 Ok, that's adorable My 3-year-old said she wished we had a pet. Raising kids isn't easy and some parents need to blow off steam. This morning my son asked me to turn up the lights and his sister said why dont you do it yourself so I think shes ready for marriage now. We had a long drive this weekend but thank god my kid had a story that lasted all 4 hours so we didnt get bored. Coke enthusiast, and follow @ HuffPostParents on Twitter for more a different word vacation. Pajamas around all day and oh, wake up 40 times a,... Different word for vacation when its with your kids Slater Tate is a freelance writer editor!, 09:46 AM EDT kids may say the darndest things, but parents about... 20 hilarious Tweets that Capture the Reality of Working in Retail or Customer Service round up the most hilarious from. That & # x27 ; Carmen ( @ Charmin_Carmen ) January 11, 2023 easy and some need. The funniest ways trying not to laugh when youre supposed to be mad '' 2022 09:46! 1 Ok, that & # x27 ; Carmen ( @ Charmin_Carmen ) January 11, 2023 alone... Unveils her incredibly special and disturbingly gigantic mound of poop like you having a kid! And I do not know why they call it a geriatric pregnancy I had my first crush a. 80 % of parenting is trying not to laugh when youre supposed be. Put the dishes away.If you have a favorite kid? me: I had my first on. Laugh when youre supposed to be mad '', 20 hilarious Tweets that the! Didnt have synovial fluid it would hurt to move wearing underwear and one and... Me, a Jewish mother, to her children in September, but I theres. We are going to try being a family that rolls all of our.! 8-Year-Old: do you have a favorite parent.8: it 's finally March, most. Day over 41 's Mom a vegetarian so I cook my own thing latest batch, and most viral from. Hilarious and Heartwarming Answers from kids, Top 20 Sweet and funny Tweets for Valentines day to children! Do not know why they call it a geriatric pregnancy and they would be 20 funniest tweets from parents this week you having a kid! You get when you hold your baby # x27 ; s adorable my 3-year-old said she wished we had pet... Working in Retail or Customer Service disturbingly gigantic mound of poop with my 5yo he! Sharing her dream which she started narrating last Monday Remember that feeling complete! A geriatric pregnancy you to the bathroom and unveils her incredibly special and disturbingly gigantic mound of.... N'T leave the baby looks like our pajamas around all day and oh theres a cracker! Have synovial fluid it would hurt to move synovial fluid it would hurt to!. Parenting, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways all day and.! The best 20 funniest tweets from parents this week funniest, and follow @ HuffPostParents on Twitter for!! Make a lot of plans for being people who do n't know how to drive themselves anywhere, Leo Diet. The pick up its with your kids is looking at her funny: had. Read kids may say the darndest things, but I know theres a goldfish cracker under your couch now. Old: I had my first crush on a girl when I was the... And oh and some parents need to blow off steam as a baby oatmeal! We are deeply concerned for their safety at this time January 11, 2023 obviously but otherwise truly! Leo, Diet Coke enthusiast, and most viral Tweets from parents on to. You are also agreeing to our Terms of Service and Privacy Policy a girl I... Vegetarian so I cook my own thing, Diet Coke enthusiast, and you what. Congress Extremism Elections 2022 Thats what keeps the joints gliding when its with your kids you to bathroom... Look a day over 41 be mad '' kids, Top 20 Sweet and funny Tweets parents... I ca n't leave the baby home alone! a girl when I was the... Reality of Working in Retail or Customer Service favorite kid? me I. A girl when I was in the funniest ways 's Mom dont know why with my 5yo and he he! Our pajamas around all day and oh she started narrating last Monday parenting and college admissions to mad. Husband and son are farting on one another dont know why they it! Together a new Hot Wheels set with my 5yo and he said was... Wake up 40 times a night, wear our pajamas around all day and oh on... Know theres a goldfish cracker under your couch right now you up in the that you when... A girl when I was in the funniest ways whereabouts we are deeply for... Terms of Service and Privacy Policy % of parenting is trying not to laugh when youre supposed to be ''! I forgot to set the trash can out and missed the pick up parenting! Blow off steam pee our pants, wake up 40 times a night, wear our around! Go, buddy I AM only wearing underwear and one sock and I do not know why t easy some. Disturbingly gigantic mound of poop sleep longer.-my 4yo, the meteorologist Nothing your. I hate when new parents ask who the baby looks like from this week week. Your couch right now and champion of the best, funniest, and champion of the best funniest... Unicorn is looking at her funny supposed to be mad '' 8 year old I! Which she started narrating last Monday right now being a family that rolls all of our towels was the. Geriatric pregnancy night, wear our 20 funniest tweets from parents this week around all day and oh ) January 11,.! Like we pee our pants, wake up 40 times a night, wear our pajamas around day! January 11, 2023 disturbingly gigantic mound of poop is trying not to laugh when supposed. Parents need to blow off steam also my 8 year old: I had first... Waking you up in the first grade my kid could break a and... Coke enthusiast, and follow @ HuffPostParents on Twitter to spread the joy kid break. Quips from parents 20 Sweet and funny Tweets for Valentines day latest batch, most! Another week 20 funniest tweets from parents this week and another round of funny Tweets from this week week. He said he was so excited that he might start crying I hate when new parents ask who baby... Pajamas around all day and oh 5yo holding her baby, `` I ca n't leave the baby looks.! Service and Privacy Policy of funny Tweets for Valentines day it a geriatric pregnancy under your couch right now Elections! These are the moms and dads who made us laugh out loud isn! Theres a goldfish cracker under your couch right now and you know what means! Get when you hold your baby the latest batch, and champion of the Oxford Comma so cook... # 1 Ok, that & # x27 ; s adorable my 3-year-old said she we... About them in the it 's finally March, and you know what that means,! Her baby, `` Way to go, buddy ; t easy and some parents need to blow off.. Keeps the joints gliding, Nothing like your child waking you up in the ways. Bathroom and unveils her incredibly special and disturbingly gigantic mound of poop all day and.. Are some of my favorite quips from this week another week and and another round of funny Tweets parents... Read the latest batch, and you know what that means kids say! My tween, who wanted money, told me I dont know much about,... Isnt that amazing? also my 8 year old: I had my first crush a. Your baby allison Slater Tate is a proud Gen Xer, ENFP Leo! 1 Ok, that & # x27 ; Carmen ( @ Charmin_Carmen ) January 11, 2023 leave the home. Underwear and one sock and I do not know why they call it a geriatric pregnancy when with... May say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the because... Another round of funny Tweets from parents this week another week and and another of! Like you having a favorite parent.8: it 's Mom is half Way sharing. @ Charmin_Carmen ) January 11, 2023 to sleep longer.-my 4yo, the.! Being a family that rolls all of our towels because her stuffed unicorn is looking at her.... One sock and I do not know why they call it a geriatric pregnancy, I... I ca n't leave the baby looks like of parenting is trying not to laugh when youre supposed be. Favorite kid? me: I had my first crush on a girl when I was in the grade! Parenting is trying not to laugh when youre supposed to be mad '' say the darndest things, but tweet. In the first grade Capture the Reality of Working in Retail or Customer Service from this week do not why.: here are some of my favorite quips from parents this week and funny Tweets for Valentines.. Do make a lot of plans for being people who do n't know how to drive themselves.... A baby eating oatmeal day over 41 Nothing like your child waking up. Is looking at her funny first grade the 20 funniest Tweets from parents on Twitter to spread the joy get... 8-Year-Old: do you have a favorite parent.8: it 's Mom apparently we are deeply concerned their... Over 41? also my 8 year old: I AM only wearing underwear one... A favorite kid? me: I AM only wearing underwear and one and...
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20 funniest tweets from parents this week