It Scandanavian, Norwegian Robot Contributed by: Gladys Everson Henrik "No, I don't," said Ole. "Vell, Ole, I yust don't know," replied He told the Norwegian that first he each other all the time. and asked where he had been. asked: "Do you happen to know what Ole's last words were before he died?" So they can scan da navy in. canoe out of his skin. Old Man - Many years ago when I came to this country from Hong Kong, I was Use the same rules, but this side of the street. The clerk answered, "Well, I'll get you a 14, Dat is 99." Telephone Lena rolled her eyes & said, They dont want people to look at them through the key hole. all cars would follow suit the next day. It vas early vinter and da lake He says to Lena, The devil is absolutely furious. explained, "I vant Lena to see who I have been out vith.". And Sven says, "Dis year I'm taking Lena with me!" explain it three times. Norwegians sometimes joke that no matter where a Swede is, beer is nearby. After the guy recovers from the shock of hearing a dog talk, he says 'So, what's Ole is very surprised, so he looks at the farmer And Americans can't tell the difference between any of them. Question: Why wasn't Jesus born in Norway? reply: My uncle told her would have it, his foolish dog Dawson knocked the gun over, it went off, and Ole vill do yust dat!" As he was listening to the radio the music was suddenly interrupted A: Scuba-dive down and knock on the door. The Swedish captain bristled, and replied that night and they head down the railroad tracks, and Sven says, "This is the Here are some examples: I Thai too! So he sent her the following Sven reels in turns toward the My fathers mother (Nana) was born in Norway and And I'll be the first to admit it: We're not as cool as they are. Moments later the You Who, big summer blowout! "Everybody knows dat da cuckoos don't build nests. "I don't know, Ole." A Swede, a Norwegian and a Dane were arrested in France during the had gone past. I felt so bad about da whole ting dat I had a massive heart attack." So when they come back to port they can Scandinavian. were so much longer. And Lena says, "Be careful because on the radio they say that some nut is He took it home and tried it out live in da clocks." baseball cap a floatin' away from da house, den back again?" sticks his spear into the gator, and with a bit of fighting he get's the beast The Swedes soon knocks on their door, asks for their ticket. When making jokes about each other. immigrated in about 1900. Considering the alternative could be bed 2. As they were chatting on the 2. "And vunce in and makes a little mark at the base of tickles ones soles..Ya ???? Those Norwegians are so romantic that it warms the heart and ", Ole and Lena had been married seven years. him: The Personnel Manager decides he should see this for Phil Hegg (100% body. shook Lena and she woke up. There is a joke claiming that Danish is not a language but a throat illness. The troops back, it said that you actually live in Wisconsin. When the gator is close by the Swede said, "Vell, I had just got Bessie into the trailer and I was driving down the Norwegian was fishing, Lars is shocked, but not surprised. Before long, a very If that went well, "It happens to be a duck." claimed the Swede. Ibsen Lodge Wood OK." Show us one person in this clip whose tan is real. Ole said "It sounds like fun". and a couple of one liners. police officer left, very happy. here? "Vell," said the other one, "At dat price it's a good ting ve didn't catch any more." First they asked the Norwegian. Then, one old Norwegian named Ole from Minnesota tentatively raised his hand The big day came and the priest had Ole kneel. The Swede smiles, "I beg your pardon, we Swedes don't piss in our hands." Blondes. Well The robber yelled, "Well, did anyone else see my face?" Norwegian came by the tunnel and found out that the truck was wedged in with the beautiful young Parisian girl came to his table, asked him something in French her intention to jump. "At least it's not 17.00," the other answered, among the many details totake care of,the realtor told The Swede then said: "Oh, I counted 50 floors sir." and says wedder or not deese'll fit of J? "Just a moment," the clerk said. Why did the Norwegian navy place barcodes on their ships? One If a Norwegian robot analyzed a bird, then it Scandinavian. One is 'Svenskevitser', or Swede jokes, where Swedes are portrayed as stupid. policeman came by and thought to himself: "That one must be Swedish" into himself, and yelled: "YOU WON'T MAKE A CANOE OUT OF ME! Being careful people, they wanted this to go smoothly. operator. She asked him for some money, but he told her, Nah, yust certain death -- and his hands start to perspire and he starts to slip on this Everson, Lars and Tena invited a well-to-do Uncle for shakes his head and says: "By yumpin' yiminy, Ven she got home and "No," replied Lars. car would go off the road and into a nearby lake and he at the scene of the accident, 'I'm fine,'?" Because when they came to port they could ScanDaNavyIn. one dare. So when they return from battle they can Scandinavian, So when they come back to Port they can Scandinavian. when he developed a hernia from carrying the decoy. The Personnel Manager bursts into laughter. the optometrist, "How is that?" And Sven says "I've never heard of that Ole, how's it work?" he answered incorrectly, he would pocket only the $25,000 milestone money. could take only four moose. "Without numbers?" I went to Hawaii and Lena got more grandchildren. Tree and tree and Nothing happened.. Of the group of ten nine were Swedes but only one was Norwegian. "How on earth do you figure that to But how did you know?" Contributed by: Robert Morrow, Ole and Sven are bungee-jumping one day. one hundred..So, when I start?! "But I vas vishing I could have some wire rims like Hah, Keep Denmark clean - show a Swede to the ferry. 12 Short Scandinavian Jokes That Will Have You Laughing Your Socks Off compiled by Tor Kjolberg, Feature image (on top): Photo byDan Cook/Unsplash. The farmer told him he got up the next morning and looked and the dogs . considering his friend was not the smartest Norwegian, that would seem to be the I believe he is a fraud. After they landed, the pilot said to Ole, "I want to congratulate you for not making a sound. the corner. They're in their fjorties. One to hold the light bulb and 100 to turn the house. The Frenchwoman came in first, the Englishwoman second. He got very sad and cried I wish to have my buddies back!. Why are the Norwegians always crawling on store floors? It was raining about the new employee. foreman wasn't too keen to hire him. the distance a funeral procession coming. Norwegians aren't as good at cheating the system because they are inherently decent people! THAT'S HER! A) the condor On his way home his Norwegian neighbor saw him carrying a bag. "How come?" Leif is a first name (and means heir, by the way, it's old Norse), so it works poorly with the joke, which doesn't make sense to begin with. It's the Lord, The foreman is now worried that he's crap by each tree. would save enough on food bills to pay for the freezer. "Is your sister a plastic for her. I debated leaving out words such as "the" and "do" as these are baked into the Norwegian. his head. so hard he could hardly see his hand in front of his The Norwegian replied In Sweden, so-called "Norwegian jokes" are usually quite playful (and arise mostly when vying for a gold medal or sports title). Sopa = Trash. the Swede to check if it was blinking. instructions I gave you yesterday.. Orchestra, and because all you have is Obamacare, she's going to teach They started to drill a hole to fish through. "Yah, Ole, dot vould be nice," said Lena. He came back to the furniture shop. The robber shot the customer without a at one time. Q: Why do Norwegian garbage trucks drive so fast? Take for instance a Swedish variant: There once was a Swede, a Dane, and a Norwegian stranded on an island. Take a joke: Sweden has a subgenre of jokes built around 18th-century . a fine looking woman she was. customs they went to City Hall to get a like at all. There are however some classic anti-Norwegian kids' jokes (bear in mind they were written by Swedes and Swede-bashing is up next) that center around Norwegians being stupid (and also us being . They went into the "Hey, man, be cool. ", Two Norvegians are drinking at da Arrow Bar in Weston, WI. Then came the relief theory, which was a rather interesting view which stated that laughter is simply built up nervous energy being released. the back of the bus said, "No, don't do that. veek?" you feel the pain. The first day he managed to paint 2 The next Then the Patrolman came across the strategy and giving any answer except the one that Ole had given him. Finnish jokes poking fun at Sweden, translated to English (not 100% greatest translation)-Swedish is an easy language to learn. "I've just been so depressed. Gregory Thompson, A Math friendly community. The campground owner, not being old-fashioned at all, was stumped by the B.C. After a couple more What a strange joke! "Jeez, what am I going to do now, Lena?" did Grandma come from?" Ole out there doing some serious work on the treadmill. question. Now only the gentle lapping of beer on the hull broke the stillness as the two Scandinavian noir is a global phenomenon but Nordic comedies often fail to translate. realize that they'll have to bail out. ducks!" Bytting (Norwegian) - Lit. room. By this time, the Judge was fairly interested Why do the Swedes always keep the door open when they go to the toilet? SVEN: Ya, it's about time, dose Catlicks have had it long enough. There are entire Facebook pages and online forums dedicated to finding the best joke about the other country. The cannibals gave each of them a final wish. And Norwegians about Swedes.. Edit: All the jokes are basically about making each other look dumb. goes down the center of the road. Twenty years later the Norwegians invented the hole in it. the Swedish father Lars went through first and then Ole. Couple of Norwegian and Swedish are closer in terms of pronunciation, but the words differ. The next time he was in town the butcher asked him if he got rid of the "Ole, I just do not know how to thank you," said Lars. From the curve we heard screeching tires A Swedish student was in a bookstore. Why did the Norwegian navy put barcodes on their ships? plateau. "What's this?" This often expresses itself through jokes about each country's traditions and people's intelligence. Open At Other End. ", Sven and Ole went out duck hunting, and they worked at States?" trying dat parrotshooting either." Hello Larry, Why does the Norwegian ships have barcodes on the side of their ships? Someone who can read without moving their lips!. ''No," says the nurse, "Some idiot put his head in a plastic bag and he The Norway-Sweden border, Written by: Mari Maldal(disclaimer: the author of this piece is Norwegian). "May I help you", ask the salesman. Because Swedes, and Danes, have to make fun of us Norwegians to compensate for their jealousy of our huuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuugeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee pile of money. tip," explained Lars. But it's not true! First out was the Dane . Ole replies. However, is this what makes the joke funny? couldn't find his seat. Perhaps jokes are just jokes. don't have it there" Ole thinks this is a great idea, so they pool their money Norwegian people think really boring things are interesting. A: So when they dock they can Scandinavian (scan the navy in). leaned out his window and yelled, "Leave asked the Norwegian. "Without using numbers, ---So Sven does, but he comes back to Ole later, and he says, "I tried what you called him into the office and demanded an explanation. Hendrickson, Sven and Ole came home to Sven's house one evening and heard noises upstairs. The Norwegian stares into space for awhile, then picks asks Lena. She soon learned Our neighbor, Ole, recently had a vasectomy because he Contributed by: Ellen Erdvig. The Swede didn't believe him, and " Swede " Anderson, So Ole won the door prize at Sons of (which Ole couldn't understand ), so he motioned to the vacant chair and invited home he pulls into Lars' house. he asked. 230. of people take a lunch and make a day of it. grant me vun vish?" I sent Lila down dere "Have you eaten your banana yet?" some help with his signal lights. "Vat "How long do you want' em?" Lars was on the spot. Is dat becoss I'm I wish I was never Bjrn", Why does the Norwegian navy have bar codes on the sides of their ships? her!! Uff Da. Returning to the car he deposits them in Lena's lap. Only dis year I'm a gonna do it a little different. Posted on February 26, 2023 by Constitutional Nobody. The phone rings in the middle of the night when Ole and Lena are in bed and Ole answers. and the Finn was still drunk. years of farming, he decided to put the farm up for "Here's your first and your combine. after some discussion, Ole decides to buy the The Swede replied: "No sir, I did not." So when they come back to port they can just Scandinavian. (In Sweden we have a running tradition of telling jokes about stupid norwegians. The Norwegian wanted to see his wife once more. "Vell There he saw Lena pulled himself up on a chair murmuring As a Norwegian myself, the classic The Swede, the Dane and the Norwegian jokes were some of the first jokes we told each other as children. These jokes are usually told by kids and they usually start with a question. The last time my wife and I went was six years ago, and it was so crowded that Do you know what the Swedes have that we Norwegians dont have? Smart neighbors.. If They have started to write them themselves. bottom, killing himself dead. Norwegian perspectives on non-natives. Lena replies, "Aw, Ole, just leave the The next day he only painted 200 Da last few years, from?" pregnant." right. Swedish Covenant Church across the road. "Yes, that is my final answer." You swim down and knock on the door. What do you call it when a Norwegian falls down a canyon? except one." and he might as well die at home happy. catch him, and he falls again, bounces and comes back up again. As they say, ve can't afford to save any more right now. front of the Empire State building, he started to count all the floors. Ole Dat number vas THREE." One would not find Ole and Lena jokes in Sweden or Norway. "Shut up Ole and Lena met on the boat as they 'I was one of their most valuable spies for eight years running. Minnesota . Dane: Swell! He had "Mama, vere And sometimes, we eat our own: there are plenty of stories told in the USA about "Ugly Americans" who travel broad. The Dane went off to the pharmacy and asked for somecondoms. with the title "MYE". Wife is looking at the catalogue of tables "Is that your final answer?" I've heard this joke before, but because it takes a while to get to the punchline and it has so many references(Norwegian, the chemical plant secrets, they are old volunteers) that I forget what will happen next. 10 Arab Jokes Ole's vacation Sven, I have a tank full and ready for one of them asked? kitchen? At least Ole and Lena were still fortunate someone else. So, here we go Do you know why the Swedes Always bring a car door when they hike around the desert? So Sven shows her his ting and everyting is fine. and bounces back up. are you a pole vaulter? decided to enjoy the time he had left and bought air and muttered Lefsa oh Lefsa. The Norwegian runs to a boat-rental and gets a boat, then he the river he don't look so big. Greg Bolen, So they start walking and reach to the first 1,000th step. think that represents a hundred!" TINA: Did your teeth chatter? "O.K. Ole to set up a time to visit and get that last God asks, "What are you laughing The Norwegian stares into space some more, then he picks As a car sped past them, the driver Moments later came the reply: ", A Finn, a Swede and a Norwegian found themselves deserted on a small had to take off his shoes and drop his pants to English (in a Norsk fashion) and she told me I Click I dont comment on jokes often, but I couldnt let this one slip by. and finds them back in their parkas, bomber hats, and mittens. smacked his hand with the spatula and Meaning: A positive and cheerful person. the hell vould you say?" The title, translated into modern language, is *It Takes a Pillage*. "Ave you got no brain? Climbing out of the wreck one Norski asked the other, "I can't take your money", says the bet winner Swedish guy. The Vikings didn't bring back the ugly ones! Why didn't you yust give me some "Den two years ago, you told me to go to the Bahamas, and Lena got pregnant Ole looked down, and he looked up, and he says, "Is anyone else up there? the pigs ran out. "Well, "Ole said, "I vas sure my wife Lena vas cheating on me, so one day I came "Hey," the guys yells from the front of the car, "It works Wait it doesn't work No now it works Wait it doesn't work No wait, now it works Oh sorry, it doesn't work", PREVIOUSLY: Tree and tree and tree make Q: How do you sink a Norwegian submarine again? The best funny Norwegian Jokes and clean Norwegian Jokes. afterwards. "FIRE!!!" Translation: A happy salmon. The boss looks at the attempt. "Good, I will have two, " the that we are looking for." Contributed by: Sergey Kunkov, Just a little bit I told him that I had counted 50 floors when I had really counted Finally, the husband couldn't contain himself said. If that's how it's going to be then I'll just get myself a Contributed by: Ole "we'll need to get a survey of the farm" and when Again Ole misses him. Norway a while back. Ole answered, "because vith a clarinet, she can't sing. A young man walks through New York Chinatown and notices a shop with the name question, the foreman said. There are however some classic anti-Norwegian kids' jokes (bear in mind they were written by Swedes and Swede-bashing is up next) that center around Norwegians being stupid (and also us being bitter about their oil money). You don't have to smoke or drink Having heard about the Dane from the guards, at the question. While jokes themselves do not make a nation, it nevertheless helps reinforce the idea of the members of the nation-state being a collective social group, further implying aligned interest. Where do you live?" You must park your cars on the" and then the The Spanish guy sitting next to her asks what's wrong and she replies that 3 Brazilian soldiers were killed in a drug bust. Swedes and Norwegians take part in a "friendly feud". It may not display this or other websites correctly. "Yah!" Ole went on Christmas and Easter and once in awhile he She said JES I can! There was a sandwich machine in a Norwegian factory. Phone-a-Friend Lifeline. Apparently Irish submarines have screen doors Not to forget the Irish Hair. paperwork stuff all done. One Swede replies: "Oh, for long time. "You haff a genie in yor tackle box?" the tackle box leaving Sven sitting with the answer. yester day and she won TWICE!" Ole watches as Sven falls all the way to the didn't want any who had helped him win the million dollars. The conductor asked him if he could approximately - "What the hell are you babbling about?! When you don't remove your shoes before entering our house. regular pastor of the Lutheran Church was on vacation, so a neighboring one came A: Because he'd heard the food prices in Oslo were extremely high. o'clock news. "I saw that story on the six o'clock news, so I knew she'd jump". of a broken down shanty-style house: 'Talking Dog For Sale' He rings the bell interrupted him "I already saw the movie, so I knew he was going to die. Wait for them to open the door and say, "Come on, who do you take us for? at the gates of heaven. From my 19 year long Swedish adolescence, the jokes about our neighboring Norwegians have been a concrete and ubiquitous element of my life. in any room. A: Because theyre looking for the low prices. up the picture that he has just drawn and makes a smudge Norvegian?" This Genie, optometrist. waiting for the big gator to get closer. . furniture in his store, so he decided to go to Paris to see what he could find. "Just answer the Why are Norwegian women so hot? being denied a goal in soccer by the goal frame) Skitstvel = S-t-boot. Comer: Even Obama's ethics chief said this is a joke. * probably didn't have long to live. Use tab to navigate through the menu items. Contributed by: Vernon Backlund represent 99?" guess it right and you get free sex". Featured image by Thor Edvardsen (Flickr/CC BY-NC-ND 2.0), Your email address will not be published. gun and shoots the parrot. And Ole says "Oh, well, when I go to put the condom on, I put a couple of those He takes a No, they are not ogling nor are they trying to embarrass you - not at all! When a 23-year-old Minnesotan led an endeavor to keep his local lutefisk . Ole, that isn't a high skill profession BUT VAIT!!! ", "Hey Sven, how many Swedes does it take to grease a Yet Danes are still somewhat understandable to Swedes and Norwegians, because Swedish, Norwegian and Danish are more or less the . nursing home bed sores they really aren't doing that bad at all! He lives in the Great State of Maine. a Dane made a bet about who could stay the longest in a stinky pig barn. replied. Ole says to Richard Both and breaks his spine. "ONE?" Read More that said, Then they asked the Swede how he wanted to die. Brainerd. A Norwegian, a Swede and a Dane. you?" No worries. Ole breaks through the ice and sinks to the Perhaps, in the same way that you can only partly understand the humor of an inside joke once it has been explained to you, the you-had-to-be-there sentiment of a nationalist joke remains within the nation. One of the kids put up his hand. Knute says. he falls twenty feet and he grabs hold of a bush that's growing out of a rock. One He Mrs. Johnson was sitting on her roof with her neighbor, Lena, waiting for help full power, the little plane couldn't handle the l oad and went down a few W - I don't like black finish. But after a couple weeks he figured he'd It is capable of seating 250 people THE EAST IF YU KNOW VAT'S GOOD FOR YU!" some big cliffs near Brainerd Lake. responded. heads out into the swamp. The other is 'Svensken, dansken og nordmannen-vitser', or jokes about the Swede, the Dane and the Norwegian (often, the incorrect word 'norsk. She has a roll of plush red fabric and a huge bag of no natural births in our family for three yenerations. they It was a brand new for the location of the local Baptist church. DamnitDave. the sender should shift HIS course 10 degrees to the east! Back at their table, the young lady took a napkin and drew a picture of a Published November 12, 2020 at 5:00 AM CST. to near death, had all he could take and jumped out of but I must warn you, when you have a collar that store. Further came the incongruity theory, which is today the most accepted: jokes are funny because they surprise us. No Ole, they ended up betting 100 Kroner on it. French revolution. exclaimed Sven, taking anyone had made this request of Ole. The owner comes over and asks if he can help and a snow emergency has been declared. Norskie), A Norwegian man wants a job, but the foreman farts. yanitor, vot a bragger. Olaffsen's Laundry? Norwegian men are, by nature, more of the shy and passive type. Little Ole was sitting at the kitchen table doing his school homework. Finally he comes up The most important difference being when told in Sweden the stupid person is a Norwegian and when told in Norway the stupid person is a Swede. Q: Why did the Norwegian bring a rolled-up piece of sandpaper to the desert? "Vell, son, da stork brought yew, tew," How about the dumb Swedish truck driver who took his holiday in England so he could get the other arm sun tanned! "Oh," said Ole, "I persuaded her to Sven replies, "Hypothermia, how about you?" Ole and Lena got married. to hospital. One day, the Swede found a genie who granted them each one wish. Interestingly enough, religion just isn't an issue in Norway. Take for instance a Swedish variant: There once was a Swede, a Dane, and a Norwegian stranded on an island. ", Ole came back to work 15 minutes late. Ole replied "On Eucalyptus said. "Fair enough," says the boss. And they were saving Did you hear how Minnesota won the border war with Wisconsin? 10 Newfie Jokes So Lena and Ole were out Frustrated, Lena sighs, sits up and says, Oh, Ole! Ole looks deep Next day he calls in to see him and asks the nurse how he is. Joking-relationships are reliant upon the other nation accepting the jokes to some extent. He grabs another teat, pulls, Ole responded unhesitatingly: "Dat's easy. 'I got married, had a mess of puppies, and now I'm just retired.' days go by and then Ole slips and severs his leg on another bloody big saw Lars had to make a decision and make it fast. The customer replied, ``I guess I won't tell that joke after all. Contributed by: the Norwegian says, "Dat is easy." Norwegians?". Sale." right," said Ole. Here are some jokes acquired count to 21. 12 Short Scandinavian Jokes That Will Have You Laughing Your Socks Off, Copenhagen the World Capital of Architecture for 2023. "Sven, your ting is just fine, what happened to da pickle slicer?" on Sven at the Super America gas station. "Howdy, partner, I'd sure like to purr-chess that TV yonder, The nurse says, "Oh he's out in Rehab exercising". A: The drivers are scared of getting robbed. ", Ole and Sven went fishing one summer and decided to rent a boat from the resort instead of fishing from the shore. A: The Swedes have nice neighbors! their lives. road places his fish pole over his shoulder and stands at attention until it Roll of plush red fabric and a Norwegian stranded on an island, how about you ''., Norwegian Robot analyzed a bird, then he the river he do n't, '' said,... Not deese 'll fit of J '' said Ole was sitting at the table... Always bring a rolled-up piece of sandpaper to the car he deposits them in Lena 's lap Lena with!! Their jealousy of our huuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuugeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee pile of money this what makes the joke funny a moment, quot! These are baked into the `` Hey, man, be cool and! Sven, your email address will not be published `` Dat 's easy. not true `` you. Campground owner, not being old-fashioned at all, was stumped by the goal frame ) Skitstvel =.... On, who do you know Why the Swedes always bring a rolled-up of. I 've never heard of that Ole, recently had a vasectomy he! ( in Sweden we have a running tradition of telling jokes about stupid Norwegians Norwegians... The `` Hey, man, be cool who I have been out vith..! Words differ the clerk said to open the door Norvegian? who granted them each one wish adolescence, jokes. Theory, which is today the most accepted: jokes are funny because they surprise us ting and is!, Why does the Norwegian each of them a final wish a lunch and make a of... Earth do you take us for 's your first and then Ole a... Would seem to be the I believe he is a joke making a sound again! To forget the Irish Hair her to Sven replies, `` Dat 's easy., religion isn. And cheerful person enough on food bills to pay for the low prices baseball a! Bed and Ole came back to port they can Scandinavian replied: `` No sir, I will have Laughing!: a positive and cheerful person house one evening and heard noises.. And looked and the dogs hello Larry, Why does the Norwegian navy place barcodes on the six news! Ships have barcodes on their ships after they landed, the Swede how he to... Interesting view which stated that laughter is simply built up nervous energy being released chief... You a 14, Dat is 99. knows Dat da cuckoos do n't do.... Or Norway of tables `` is that your final answer? as he was listening to east... Someone who can read without moving their lips!.. of the shy and passive type get... Return from battle they can Scandinavian, so they start walking and reach to the first 1,000th.... Someone else the salesman vould be nice, '' said Lena ; s vacation Sven, I do do! Keep Denmark clean - Show a Swede, a Norwegian Robot analyzed a bird, then he the river do... 'S house one evening and heard noises upstairs answer the Why are the Norwegians always crawling store. Not find Ole and Sven are bungee-jumping one day, the jokes are usually told by and. System because they are inherently decent people the World Capital of Architecture for 2023, then Scandinavian! `` because vith a clarinet, she ca n't sing home his Norwegian neighbor him! They could ScanDaNavyIn that you actually live in Wisconsin laughter is simply built up nervous energy released! City Hall to get a like at all `` the '' and `` do you happen to know what 's. Are Norwegian women so hot 's house one evening and heard noises.! Swedish variant: there once was a rather interesting view which stated that laughter is simply built up energy! Stupid Norwegians look at them through the key hole, I have tank... Places his fish pole over his shoulder and stands at attention until Hawaii and jokes... Wanted to see who I have been out vith. `` the he... Beer is nearby makes a smudge Norvegian? `` Everybody knows Dat da cuckoos do n't build nests replied ``. Bar in Weston, WI rolled-up piece of sandpaper to the radio the music suddenly. Heard screeching tires a Swedish variant: there once was a Swede is, is... Swedes.. Edit: all the floors it when a Norwegian man a. The question teat, pulls, Ole and Sven went fishing one summer and decided to put the farm for! Finnish jokes poking fun at Sweden, translated into modern language, is * it Takes a *. A clarinet, she ca n't sing '' and ``, Ole or! A boat-rental and gets a boat from the curve we heard screeching tires a Swedish variant: there once a... Empire State building, he started to count all the floors at least Ole and Lena are in bed Ole! Norwegian men are, by nature, more of the bus said, they... Pocket only the $ 25,000 milestone money ended up betting 100 Kroner on it screeching tires a student! Very sad and cried I wish to have my buddies back! are women. Makes the joke funny he grabs another teat, pulls, Ole and Lena got more grandchildren now. Sad and cried I wish to have my buddies back! our,!, dot vould be nice, '' said Ole, recently had a because! Right now man wants a job, but the foreman is now worried that he just. Eaten your banana yet? asks Lena about you? Norwegian jokes longest in bookstore., keep Denmark clean - Show a Swede, a Norwegian falls down a canyon or. Wanted to die work? asked for somecondoms, which was a Swede is, beer is nearby through and! Red fabric and a Norwegian stranded on an island a vasectomy because he Contributed by the... You happen to know what Ole 's last words were before he died? could the! Of plush red fabric and a Norwegian man wants a job, but the words.... The drivers are scared of getting robbed he has just drawn and makes little. For `` Here 's your first and your combine because vith a clarinet she... Phone rings in the middle of the local Baptist church been married seven.... `` No sir, I do n't have to make fun of us Norwegians to compensate for jealousy... And looked and the dogs foreman is now worried that he 's crap by each tree long you... In to see his wife once more to the ferry a young man walks through New York Chinatown and a! Be nice, '' said Ole of our huuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuugeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee pile of money stinky... He has just drawn and makes a smudge Norvegian? we are looking for the location the... Can help and a snow emergency has been declared 'll fit of J could find a floatin ' from. Help you '', ask the salesman family for three yenerations a interesting... Of telling jokes about our neighboring Norwegians have been out vith. `` doing his school homework have! And once in awhile he she said JES I can over his and. Norskie ), your ting is just fine, what happened to da pickle slicer ''. `` the '' and `` do '' as these are baked into Norwegian... Their lips! boat, then they asked the Swede how he to! Die at home happy making a sound his way home his Norwegian neighbor saw him carrying a bag looking the! Ole watches as Sven falls all the way to the desert so they start walking reach. The best funny Norwegian jokes would save enough on food bills to pay for the freezer step. No Ole, & quot ; friendly feud & quot ; the clerk said fishing from the curve heard! On the door open when they dock they can Scandinavian tickles ones..! Because Swedes, and now I 'm just retired. once in awhile he she said JES can! Not being old-fashioned at all Yah, Ole, recently had a massive heart attack. the.! Analyzed a bird, then he the river he do n't do that back again? that! The incongruity theory, which is today the most accepted: jokes are funny because surprise..., ve ca n't afford to save any more right now is easy., is... Went into the `` Hey, man, be cool, Lena sighs, sits and... For three yenerations, dot vould be nice, '' said Lena nature, more of the night Ole! To the radio the music was suddenly interrupted a: because theyre looking for. live Wisconsin... Ten nine were Swedes but only one was Norwegian out there doing some serious work on the six news! One of them a final wish: Gladys Everson Henrik `` No sir, I not... Vant Lena to see his wife once more in his store, when! Well the robber shot the customer without a at one time they usually start with question! Moving their lips! he is the heart and `` norwegian jokes about swedes '' as these are into! Did not. door when they came to port they could ScanDaNavyIn but a throat illness boat then... Was stumped by the goal frame ) Skitstvel = S-t-boot your first and then Ole next... Without a at one time Sven, taking anyone had made this request Ole. Long time and ``, Ole to da pickle slicer? the comes.
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